A Personal Reflection on Social Media
In front of the screen is not where life is to be lived.
As our society becomes increasingly connected through the world of social media, I find myself struggling to keep up with it all. It isn't that I don't understand the nuances of Instagram algorithms or how to maximize growing followers on Twitter; the truth is, I just don't want to…
And once I recognized that I made the decision to step away from using social media the way I had been for years.
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Some have called reducing social media by 90%+ a “bold move”, but there’s absolutely nothing impressive about not being hooked on your phone and internet connections.
In today's digital age, where social media presence is often equated with success, people have placed a greater emphasis on your “social media credit score” than it ever deserved. For me, it was a simple choice and more of an issue with personality than anything else. I’m not going to "play the algorithm" or conform to the trends and hashtags that seem to dominate the online world.
I tried, and when I did, I wasn’t good at it because it wasn’t what I wanted to do.
The straw that broke the attempt at keeping up was when I found myself feeling drained and inauthentic. I was tweeting for the sake of tweeting and making TikToks because I saw the potential there, not because I wanted to, but because I thought I had to, and once I “have” to do something, I’m out.
Call it the contrarian in me, or maybe the confrontational revolutionary that hates being told what to do, whatever label describes that mindset, I realized that once I had to use social media, I chucked it in the fuck it bucket.
I am good at a lot of things:
Coaching Youth Sports
Leading men in their life, marriage, and parenting
I have coached many individuals to improve their lives beyond their wildest expectations, and I continue to do so through my private community, the Fraternity of Excellence. FoE is my "home base" for online engagement, where I can connect with individuals on a deeper level. However, outside of that, I struggled to find my footing in the vast and often overwhelming world of social media.
Yes, I have made some money through my online endeavors, and I continue to do so; since I began taking it seriously in 2016, I’ve made over half a million dollars. But for me, it has never been about the financial gain so much as the experience. This is one of the reasons I had to step away; I’m not good at playing that game. I see guys like Jose Rosado, AJAC, Ed Latimore, and I dig what they’re doing, but that’s not for me.
They’re very successful because they want to be, they enjoy it, and they are good at it.
I would much rather make my moves in the brick-and-mortar world, with a segment of my growth coming from the internet side of the house. That’s not a knock on those men; if I were better at understanding how to balance the online grind, I wouldn’t be working landscaping, and that would have left me with more time to be a more present husband and father. I am currently better suited for in-person interactions where I can have a more meaningful impact on those around me.
Something else that frustrated me about the online world, which I feel warrants being addressed, is similar to what drove me from the Church: people put on a show for their hour in God’s house on Sunday and are terrible humans the rest of the week.
So, too, do a majority of the “influencers” you see making money online.
I’ve met these people, done business with them, and I saw their timelines…
Things didn’t add up, especially when wealthy and healthy individuals online were broke jokes or emotionally unstable when the screen was off. As a teen, the more I asked about people’s faith, the less I believed in it, and that happened with social media as well.
Now, I’ve since found my peace with it and brought the focus onto myself and my use of the electrons, but I have to admit that the disappointment of seeing faux-success started to make me jaded and played a role in my pullback from it all.