How Men Can Embrace Their Authentic Masculinity for Lasting Personal Growth

You're a man, act like it.

“Why do you care how other men act?”

It strikes me as odd that people think I make my content up out of thin air, as my experiences and interactions inspire my work. I write about content like this because there are men struggling with these types of issues; I know it because I’ve been working with many over the years.

In an age where fathers are mostly away at work or home but distracted by a screen and checked out from the incessant barrage of messaging telling them they’re idiotic or worthless, young men do not have examples of strong male role models to emulate, and, therefore they find themselves adrift without a map to show them the way to living like a capital “M” Man.

Our world is challenging traditional notions of what a Man is, and it is crucial for men, in today’s age, free from this modern attempt at distorting the notion of manhood, to reclaim and nurture their innate sense of masculinity.

Masculinity is not an outdated archetype of any sort, it is hardwired into a man’s mind; it is the thing that gets a man out of bed when there’s a bump in the night; it’s what has him stand in front of his woman and children, being the immovable object between them and anything trying to bring harm their way.

Masculinity is what makes a man capable of holding a child one moment and punching evil directly in its fucking face the next.

Men can cultivate their masculinity in healthy and positive ways, even if they did not have the best role model growing up.

If you're a man looking to infuse your life with a strong sense of masculinity, here are five invaluable pieces of advice to help you on your journey toward personal growth and purposeful masculinity.

Photo by danilo.alvesd on Unsplash

1. Define (& Defend) Your Values and Priorities

To bring masculinity into your life, it's essential to understand what you stand for and value most. Reflect on your beliefs, principles, and aspirations, and use them as guiding forces in every decision you make. Identifying your core values will empower you to live with authenticity, setting the stage for a life filled with purpose and meaning.

You see men like myself, and the messaging is:

• Overcome your past traumas

• Do not allow vices to control you

• Make sure you prioritize yourself and your family over all others

Then you’ll see other men saying:

• Get as financially free as possible to escape the system.

• Be as prepared as you can be with food, water, and ammo.

• Get involved in your local politics to keep the evil overlords away.

It isn’t that either message is right or wrong, it’s that different men have different priorities and values which they find to be more worthy of their time and attention. The ultimate man is aware and as prepared for it all as he can be, but you can’t do everything, so you must prioritize and take action to get headed in the direction you want your life to go.

What type of man are you, and how would anyone know that?

2. Pursue Physical and Mental Strength

True masculinity isn't solely about physical prowess, but it’s a heavily weighted element to a man, along with his mental and emotional strength.

All men must engage in regular physical exercise to build both strength and discipline.

Challenge yourself intellectually by reading, learning new skills, or pursuing educational goals. Cultivating physical and mental resilience will enhance your confidence and prepare you to navigate life's challenges with integrity and fortitude.

Me wife captured me getting after it in our home gym

I’m a bad motherfucker.

Life has thrown every pitch you can imagine my way, and I’ve hit more than missed, but I’ve never quit, even when going through a slump of “not getting on base” to stick with the baseball imagery here.

1. Childhood Trauma

2. Relationship Trauma

3. Physical/Mental Trauma

I’ve faced it all, and I keep moving forward due to my physical capability, emotional resolve, and intellectual capacity.

A man must be capable of controlling his emotions, both high and low responses; he must also be capable of being there when his number is called.

I’ve shared the story a few times, I won’t get too deep into it here, but my son would not be alive if I were not in the physical and mental shape that I am. I had to make split-second decisions and get myself into a dangerous situation to retrieve him, then get us both out alive because there was no way I was leaving without him.

As I said, a story for another time but a testament to the message that you need to be strong mentally, physically, and spiritually.

3. Embrace Personal Responsibility