3 Fears Disappeared the Moment I Went Sober

Sobriety didn’t just remove alcohol, it removed the risks I was taking with my family, my brain, and my future.

Sobriety didn’t just remove alcohol from my life; it removed a set of quiet, persistent fears I used to carry around without fully admitting they were there.

These weren’t dramatic, rock-bottom fears; they were subtler than that, more dangerous to a degree because they weren’t dramatic, and they lived in the background and shaped how I moved through life.

I told myself I was fine, but what I didn’t realize was how much mental space those fears were occupying until sobriety gave me clarity.

The first fear was one no parent likes to admit out loud.

I feared that if one of my kids got seriously sick or injured in the evening, I wouldn’t be in a state of mind to act as effectively and efficiently as I would otherwise be able to.

I feared an accident, a fever, a phone call from my child, who may be at a friend’s house late at night, a split-second emergency that required calm, decisive action, and that I might hesitate, second-guess, or worse, be unable to drive.

That fear is gone now.

I live in a constant state of readiness and can always get behind the wheel, control my emotions, and show up fully present and prepared.

That change alone has brought a level of peace I didn’t know I was missing.

The second fear centered on my brain and long-term health.

I worried about cognitive decline, especially with things like Alzheimer’s and dementia…

I don’t feel it in some abstract way, but rather, in a deeply personal one.

Alcohol is not neutral when it comes to the brain; it increases inflammation, disrupts neurotransmitters, and interferes with sleep, which is when the brain performs its most important maintenance.

Removing alcohol allowed my nervous system to downshift, inflammation began to decrease, and my thinking has become sharper, my memory improved, and the mental fog lifted.

The body can repair itself when it’s no longer fighting a toxin every day, and from all that I have read, neuroplasticity improves, sleep stabilizes, and the brain regains its ability to regulate mood, focus, and memory better than before...

That fear I had has been replaced with confidence in my body’s ability to heal, and I know that in the future I will never look back and say, “I wish I took better care of my brain” because now, I am doing my best.

The third fear was that alcohol was stealing my potential.

Not that alcohol was sucking my soul from my body, but in a less dramatic way, it was making me “less than”.

It was enough to keep me more tired, stressed, and operating below my best. Alcohol slows everything down; it dulled my ambition, increased anxiety, and robbed me of high-quality energy without the addition of caffeine.

When you’re building a business, a family, and a life with intention, you don’t have clarity or drive to spare. Sobriety removed the drag, and now my days are no longer limited by the night before.

My stress tolerance is higher, my focus is clearer, and I can give full effort to the things I care about, instead of rationing energy because I’m depleted from “relaxing” with a drink…

Sobriety didn’t make me superhuman; it made me dependable.

Dropping booze removed the quiet gamble I didn’t realize I was taking every night, which was the risk that something could happen and I wouldn’t be at my best when it mattered most.

As a father, there is no acceptable margin for “good enough.” You don’t get to pause a crisis, reschedule an emergency, or explain to your child that you were just a little off that night, and have no doubt about it, your family will never forget when they needed you, and you weren’t there because you wanted to have liquid poison to “feel good”.

Being clear, capable, and present isn’t a bonus; it’s the baseline that should be a non-negotiable.

What sobriety ultimately gave me wasn’t just health or productivity; it gave me certainty.

Certainty that if my kids need me, I’m ready.

Certainty that I’m not slowly sacrificing my mind for a temporary escape.

Certainty that the life I’m building isn’t being quietly undercut by something I called “relaxing.”

Alcohol took more than I ever admitted, but sobriety gave back something far more valuable, which was the ultimate level of trust in myself, and once you know you’re no longer operating at a deficit, you don’t miss the drink; you wonder why you ever tolerated the risk in the first place.

- Zac Small