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“We’re Happy”
I’ve been writing on marriage and family for 11 years, and throughout that time, I’ve witnessed trends, themes, and the ebbs and flows in society’s view of “the state of marriage”.
One thing which has never changed is people’s inability to recognize how they are the source of their problems, not their relationship status.
The inability to objectively asses one’s self is compounded by severe cognitive dissonance driven by social media, mainstream narratives, political weaponization of the family, and a loss of strong examples.
Marriages on TV and in Movies look like a clown crying while the painted-on smile is still beaming - something isn’t right about it. We see people together, committed for life, yet miserable, hate one another, and actively work against each other, not together for a common cause.
In marriage, you see these men saying, “Happy Wife, Happy Life” while they are sexually dissatisfied, feel disrespected, and don’t even know the woman they married any longer, and then there are wives sharing with their lady friends how “everything is great at home” as she sips her sixth glass of wine…
Both are living lives of quiet despair, and neither are aware that they can solve their problems by being open and honest with one another about what’s not working.
Marriage is one of the most important and challenging relationships in life.
It requires both parties to be willing to work hard, communicate effectively, and be open to compromise while developing both as individuals and as a couple. This is not easy sometimes, but with a few tips, you can lead a happy and fulfilling marriage.
How to Have a “Happy Marriage”
I’m going straight Bob Ross here; we’re talking about using some Alizarin Crimson to paint a happy husband here and Phthalo Blue to get a smiling wife there, then we’re going to use some Cadmium Yellow to add smiling kids over near this happy little tree…
I’m done.
First and foremost, knowing that your relationship status does not define who you are as a person is essential. The individual you married committed to you for who you were then and the potential you had for who they thought you could become.
Make sure to express your love through your sustained, authentic approach to life. Keep being who you are as a person, not as a husband or wife. The hobbies, physique, friends, and traditions may shift slightly, but never should the standards be thrown out the window now that you’ve “locked someone down”.
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