Kill Your God-Like Status
You are human, no more or less.
People are not infallible.
We must never allow ourselves to lose touch with our human nature. The one thing distinguishing us from the “beasts” is our ability to use logic, reason, think of 2nd, 3rd, and 4th order events, and the ever-important objective self-assessment we’re capable of making. We can look at ourselves from the third person, and it’s there that we must never “slack” or turn a blind eye.
When it comes to parenting, this is especially important as we may begin to believe the lie that we are all powerful creatures who can distort reality and avoid all consequences for our behaviors.
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While parenting is an area I naturally gravitate towards, this piece will not only focus on the “God Like” status we assign ourselves once becoming a mother or father, but also on the “God Like” status we give others; men and women we know to be fallible just like us, yet for some skill, look, or a reason known only to you they get a seat at the altar of “Greater than the rest”.
Adults project this deity-esque respect and admiration onto celebrities, love interests, and perceived saviors - be they Gurus, Politicians, or Activists.
Children project this onto their parents, their superhero inspirations, and the great characters they read about in their books.
Neither of the above are correct; there are no Gods walking among us.
Parents Are People
Parents like to think they can act however they want to their children, and no matter what is said or done, be it neglection, abuse, or emotional warfare - acting like a tyrant in the home, etc., parents get caught up in “being the authority” to the point that, as I mentioned in the introductory paragraph, they forget, they aren’t God.
But that’s not how most see it:
God flooded the Earth, killing damn near everything; yet, we praise him.
God wiped out entire cities, sparing nobody; yet, we seek his acceptance.
Contrast that to parental actions:
Parents slap, spank, and whip their children, yet it’s okay because it is for the kid’s own good.
Parents speak poorly of, disrespect, and verbally abuse their children, yet society says these adults should always be respected and appreciated by their children.
Parents think kids owe them acceptance, love, and access, regardless of how they’ve treated them, which is entirely false, and the more we can get children to realize this - the better. I’m not saying let’s tell 8-year-old Suzie and 13-year-old Timmy they don’t have to love their parents; I’m also talking about waking up the 20-50+ year-olds out there who are still working to make their mom and dad happy, proud, and to show they’re a good child - even though they were treated like shit.
No child is obligated to love their parent;
Any adult suggesting otherwise needs to accept that to indicate a child should love their mother or father unconditionally is to suggest that there is no standard to which any parent should perform to receive love from their children; no matter how the child is treated, they owe it to their life-givers for bringing them into this world. And it’s this exact shame that is leveraged against these children their entire lives.
You must love me, care for me, and take me in - I am your parent.
Nothing could be further from the truth, as no child ever asked to be born; it was a choice made by two adults. That child neither asked to come into this world nor did they ask for you to be their parents; it’s just the way things played out, and as your child grows, it is on you, the mother and father, to forge such a relationship that as more independence is had, they return to connect with you out of choice, not an obligation. In lamen’s terms, you need to be a good person and parent, so your kids want to see you and don’t feel as though they’re “supposed to”.
Parents who find themselves thinking their child is being rude, selfish, or reserved should look in the mirror and ask themselves why that is. People love to look at “the kids” as the problem when it’s time we look at the fact that the kids are products of their parents, and thus, it’s mom and dad, not son and daughter, who need to do some internal work and make changes to gain and no longer expect the blind admiration of their children.
You are not a god because you procreated; you are a human being with flaws and features who gets it wrong and right.
Nobody Is Coming to Save You
There are no politicians, celebrities, or personalities who can save you from yourself, and yet that’s what you want, pray, and hope for, isn’t it?
You want someone who will make this world better, and I’m confident there are some whom you’ve already chosen as your savior that will help everything be alright. For many, it was Donald Trump; people thought he’d be the man who’d “Drain the Swamp” (he didn’t) and “bring those crooked career politicians to court” (he didn’t), and yet, his lack of follow-through is overlooked, his inconsistencies given a pass, and his weaknesses or straight up gaps in ability are dismissed as, “He’s Donald Trump” - and yes, the same could be said for those worshipping Kim Kardashian, Joe Biden, Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Ron DeSantis, AOC, Pfizer, etc.
These people are given “God-Like” permission to do as they please without question because you have, for some reason, found it necessary that they are given that power in your reality because it makes you feel like we’re going to be okay and make it out of this just so long as X is leading the way, there’s hope, and that hope is the hope you need to not give up on it all because if you don’t have X on your screen and out there giving speeches while making their waves, then you’d have to face that the responsibility for anything that happens in your world falls on your shoulders to be carried out and that fucking terrifies you…
We need to stay on this line of thought for a moment; this right here is the part of the article where you need to focus your efforts as this is my call to action - Give yourself permission to be as important X and as necessary in solving the issues we see on the micro and macro levels; permit yourself to admit, they’re just a person, and you are too, you don’t need a superhero in your life, you need to change some things in your day to day - swapping poor habits for better ones and realizing you’re the one in the driver’s seat, capable of inspiring those around you and making your world a better one by embodying your values and willing them into existence.
You don’t need anyone to look up to with the hope they can make the world easier on you; grab the wheel and steer your life to better lands; you have always been the exact person you needed all along.
- Zac Small